Jul 1, 2014

HSG Test Success

I know you have all been on the edge of your seats waiting for my results, so let's hop to it!
(PS- if you follow me on Instagram, then you already know!)
Everyone else....well, here's what happened...
I woke up yesterday, relieved that the labor pains from my medication had stopped, and ready to shovel a day's worth of food in my mouth.
You know, the whole not eating 8 hours before surgery deal.
I'm up by 6:45am, tell Mark goodbye, I can tell he is concerned with my day.

I worked from 7:30-11:30am then took a quick nap. My goal was to move as little as possible, because I tend to get light headed and sick feeling if I don't eat every few hours.
Not to mention, not drinking anything after 7am is super freaking tough when you drink 100 oz of water a day!!

I checked Bloglovin' and watched ALG Uninterrupted do a make-up tutorial. Not that I was looking for tips, but it is always so fascinating to me to watch others get ready. Call me weird. She is darling, by the way, and complains that she hates her voice, but I think it is just fabulous.

Anyways, I hop in the shower and my mom shows up to chauffeur me to the hospital.
We arrive at 2:10pm. I get checked in and am shuffled to my waiting room.
But first, of course, I am required to pee in a cup to make sure I am not pregnant.
I start laughing, "I can assure you if I was pregnant, I wouldn't be here willingly doing this."
I manage to squeeze out a tiny bit of pee after having nothing to drink and change into my sexy backless gown and bright yellow skidster socks. 
The nurse checks my vitals, take more information, copies my insurance cards and ID, and preps me for an IV.
Gross out.
I don't know what it is about needles, but they totally freak me out. I have been stabbed a million times and it never gets easier.
Not to mention, the nurses get weirded out that I start my crazy yoga breathing techniques.
Deep, slow breathes as I am trying to picture some pose that requires a lot of concentration.
I made sure to give her a head's up that I am psycho and it's something I need to do, so just get over it.
She laughs and complies.
And thank the lawd I did that because her first attempt at poking me was a failure.
She finds a vein in the top of my hand and tries, but there seems to be "a bit of resistance" and she didn't want to poke through a tendon.
I haven't been to the ER in a while, but I do vividly remember this happening before, so I tell her I think they did it in my wrist the last time.
She tries there and winner winner chicken dinner.
That, my friends, was the grossest part of the day.
I always get a little panicky that I'm going to move too quickly or someone is going to pull the fucking IV out of me by accident. ugh....I am shivering just thinking about it.

My mom and watch an old Friends re-run and wait for 30-ish minutes.

Anyways, then my boyfriend shows up.
You know....the anesthesiologist.
This swell fellow greets me with a big ole smile, says his name is Kevin, and his words melt me...
"Hi Tia...I'm Kevin. Let's talk about the greatest nap you are about to take. Most patients like to be awake enough to open their eyes, but I have a feeling you would like to snooze a bit. Sound good?"
Faaannnnnn-tastic.

Then my gyno shows up. I say Hi but make sure to give her a piece of my mind after the pain from last night.
You know Doc...you should really make a point to have the receptionist tell me how much pain I was going to be in after taking those awful pills. She didn't even mention cramping and I can confirm that I felt I was going to give birth to a phantom baby. She could actually use that phrase if she wants....because it's the truth.

The doc laughs and says she will make sure it happens, and we're off to get the procedure done.
The wheeler nurse rolls me down the hallways, but stops to take out a glorious warned blanket from a magic cabinet and lays it over me. It's like a spa but with terrible lighting.

They shuffle me into the brightest room I have ever been in....the Eagles are playing in the background and my boyfriend shows up behind me and whispers to me, "Happy juice is flowing...we'll see you on the flip side."  And I'm out.
I wake up in a different room with another nurse.  She greets me and of course I immediately ask
Can I have babies?

She confirmed to me....."Yes, your tubes are open, there are no abnormalities and there weren't any complications."

And then I asked her if the anesthesiologist does epidurals becuase I wanted to book him for the birth of my child. And also if he was single (he wasn't) which is fine becuase I was on drugs and may have forgotten about Mark for a second. (I didn't...promise babe)
I rambled to the nurse that Kevin probably has the best job ever...his entire job is to make people happy and then leave. Pretty sweet if you tell me. 
Now, before the procedure, they gave me a line of bullshit about it taking 2 HOURS to recover.
F that nonsense....I have no time for recovery.
There is a list of to-do's on the wall that I have to complete before they release me.
I take it as a challenge to complete them as fast as possible.
Drink water....no problem, I'm parched and that cup is child's play compared to my big green jug.
Have a snack.....let's do this Goldfish. My mom laughs as I empty the tiny bag into my mouth like it's my last meal.
Walk around.....perfect, I have to pee anyways, so they drag my IV behind me and I go to the bathroom.
Sit in a chair....done and done. Can I get dressed now?
Let's get the wheel chair ready. I'm outta here.

The nurse is reading over my discharge papers and mentions that I shouldn't go back to work for a week.
My mom looks at me with concern but I wink at her to lock it up.
No problem, I say. Knowing damn well that won't happen. One day is enough, trust me.

I had the tiniest bit of cramping immediately following the surgery but otherwise, nothing since.
I slept for 12 HOURS last night. I can't remember the last time I did that.
And...I went on a four mile walk today. 

I'm feeling positive. Hopeful. Whatever you want to call it. On top of the world.
I truly believe going back to a normal routine sooner than later helps speed recovery. 
Not pushing myself too hard, but not falling back on the comfort of laying around either. 

 
 ****************************************************************
 
 While you are reading, please meet my July sponsors.
The summer gets tough to keep readers interested, and I had anticipated lower numbers this month.
But I have four beauties to keep your interest peaked during the hottest month of the summer!!

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You will be hearing more from me in the month to come from these lovely ladies!!

Thank you for following my journey!!

10 comments:

  1. haha phantom babies? And you can always hook Kevin up with a friend. I'm sure they would appreciate it.

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  2. Glad you got good news! But seriously, take it easy girl! If that's what it takes to get pregnant than do it! Erin's orders! Ha! ;)

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  3. Glad all is good with your ladybits now :)

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  4. that is so annoying! i remember needing to do the same thing before my HSG.
    i was there TWO DAYS prior for an ultrasound, then had to pee in a cup! i was like SERIOUSLY??!

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  5. Kevin is my boyfriend. Step. Off. Bitch.

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  6. I do love your Kevin! He should make rounds around the country. Great news on the HSG results! I guess it is good to know so you and kevin, err I mean Mark can make beautiful babies.

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  7. Woohooo for good news!!!!!!! I laughed so hard about Kevin - aren't they amazing??? I felt the same way about my guy for the c-section. He. was. awesome. He saw one look of fear go over my face and he juiced me up again, lol!

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  8. Man, how the frig did I miss all this??? I am SO SO SO SO happy you received good news. Take it easy this weekend (stop rolling your eyes!) and enjoy the holiday <3
    Propofol is the bests stuff EVER. There's a reason Michael Jackson called it his Magic Milk.

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